8 More Gifts for the Boring Ass Adult in Your Life

 This post contains affiliate links BUT per usual, I only link items that I love and have bought myself or genuinely think are awesome!.

Don't let the title of this post fool you, I would be THRILLED to receive any single one of these gifts.  As we get older our gifts get more practical, but that doesn't mean they have to suck!

A few of the gifts are very 2020....but that's where we're at people.  Might as well give a gift that makes sense.

Sterilizing Box

Let's get it rolling with a sterilizing box.  I think Covid has brought stuff to light, but the world is disgusting anyway.  Probably wouldn't hurt to throw your germ infested phone and keys into a sterilizer once and while. I'm linking two versions.  One is more affordable and on the smaller end.  Great for phone, keys, glasses etc.  The other is for if you want to get REALLY serious with some stuff.

Smaller Sterilizing Box

Larger Sterilizer Box

Bidet

I'm not just saying this to say this, pinky swear.  About this time last year I started to toy around with the idea of buying a bidet but just never pulled the trigger.  Then you know what happened.... I really hope my thoughts of hosed down nethers didn't jinx this whole thing.  Anyway, they sold out everywhere but are coming back.  This particular one is priced really well and has 11K 4.5 star reviews.  Sounds promising (and refreshing) to me!

Bidet

Puzzle Boards or Mats

I have always been somewhat of a puzzler.  It was one of my favorite summertime activities as a kid with my mom and sister.  We were cooped up in the house because of Arizona's god forsaken heat and puzzling really helped pass the time.  During quarantine non puzzle people became puzzle people.  Support their hobby with a puzzle mat or board.  I bought the mat myself because I wanted to work my way up and see if the full blown board was worth the money....and I think it is.  I want one for the drawer organization.  Looks pretty sweet!

Puzzle Mat

Puzzle Board with Storage Drawers

Coffee Frother 

I never buy coffee from shops. I'm cheap and am totally content making it myself at home.  These frothers give your home cup of coffee a little extra sumthin'.  I had a different model for years and recently switched to this one and love it SOOOO much more! I love the design and feel in your hand and much prefer its push button as opposes to the switch of my old one.  High recommend!

Handheld Frother

Massage Gun

I started working out this year, like for real.  I'm basically the face of fitness now. (anybody spit out their frothed coffee when they read that?)  I don't have one of these but damn does it look amazing! This one is priced in the middle of the road and has over 6K 4.5 star reviews

Massage Gun 

Door Opener

This handy little tool is awesome! Open doors and push buttons without every actually having to touch the item. Even after covid (whenever that is) I think this is a great idea that should stick around.  They come in a variety pack and make great stocking stuffers

Door Opener

Revlon Dryer Brush

I really love this product! It dries and smooths your hair while giving volume.  It's a great tool to have even if you don't use it everyday. I still do a fair amount of air drying to avoid heat tools and am still glad I have this for when I need it.

Dryer Brush

Food Sensitivity Test

In a previous years post I included with ancestry testing kit.  This is like the slightly less cool version of that. But who doesn't want to know why they sometimes shit their pants and nose is always stuffy?  

Food Sensitivity Test

Well, there ya have it.  I hope this helps spark some ideas for those boring ass adults in your life.  And here are the links to past years posts for even more ideas.

First Year

Second Year

Puzzle Advent Activity

I thought of the idea for this puzzle advent calendar last Christmas but it was too late into the season to blog it.  Now, I'm actually glad! It makes more sense this year than ever.  I have always been a puzzle lover.  It was summertime activity while we were cooped up in the house.  Quarantine made allllll kinds of people that weren't previously puzzle people a part of the club (this club also bakes banana bread and drinks whipped coffee😉)

Now you can take your love for puzzling and turn it into a fun countdown to Christmas!  It's super easy and completely customizable.  You can do big puzzles or small puzzles.  Divide it out over 12 days or 24....whatever you want!  All you do is divide up the puzzles pieces into 12 or 24 bags. (I divided mine into 12 bags because I want to do two different puzzles over the course of December) Number the bags 1-12 or 1-24. Each day you open one bag to to help move you along in putting the puzzle together.  It will get more fun with each passing day as you will have more pieces to work with.

Here is the key:

Before you bag up the pieces, group them up into sections of the puzzle.  For example, make the first couple of days strictly edge pieces.  Then, move your way into groupings of pieces that go to a specific part of the puzzle. This way, each day you are more likely to actually have pieces to put together and not just stare at them all until waaaaaay down the line.  You know they will have something to put together.

That's it!  Simple but fun and the whole family can join in. It can be something you do before bed every night. At the end of it you will have a festive puzzle and it will be Christmas Day. Win and win!

Nana's Potato Salad

My mom was the potato salad lady.  She was the one to bring it to every extended family event growing up and made it at home for summer holidays.  She didn’t make it often because when she did she made A LOT  (like 10# of just potatoes...then add in the other stuff)  Because of this I never had any other form of potato salad for most of my childhood.  The first time I had store-bought went a little something like this.

 

And then as I got a little older I started having it at friends houses and other gatherings.  Again, even if it wasn’t bad it wasn’t quite “right” and I didn’t know why.  When people told me what was in it, it was all the same ingredients as my mom so I wasn’t understanding the huge flavor disconnect.

Potatoes:✔
Mayo:✔
Mustard:✔
Eggs:✔
Onion:✔
Celery:✔
 
Then, one day I was finally in the presence of someone else making potato salad.  I had NO IDEA that when other people put the hard boiled eggs in theirs that it was literally just chopped up hard boiled eggs....NOW I got it. What we do is separate the yolks from the egg whites and mash the yolks with the mayo and the mustard just how you would when making deviled eggs.  In fact, as I scoured the internet I realized that the few recipes that did this called it "Deviled Egg Potato Salad."  You might not think it makes a difference but it really, REALLY does!  Instead of your potato salad feeling like straight up mayo it's a thick, rich sauce.  It's a game changer that you need to try if you don't already make it this way.
 
See, my mom always followed my nana's recipe.  Actually, it has always just been a method until now.  There’s never been an official written recipe with quantities until I came in generations later and saved the day 😉 (takes a bow) We also like to add black olives to ours.  If you really hate them I guess you can skip it, but we have always put it in ours.  We don't chop them fine. Instead, we either buy the small olives and keep them whole or just halve them.

Give this potato salad a try! I have had several people comment on it being the best they've ever had when I bring it to potlucks.

Nana's Potato Salad

5lbs. Potatoes, peeled
2 cups Celery, small diced
2 cups Onion, fine diced
12 Hard boiled eggs
2 cups Mayo
1/2 cup Mustard
1 Tb. Kosher salt
Pepper to taste
1 can Black olives

1. Place potatoes in a pot with enough water to cover.  Bring to a boil and cook until soft enough to pierce with a knife all the way through but not mushy. Boiling your potatoes whole rather than in cubes gives it better texture and keeps from getting watery. 
2. Allow the potatoes to cool completely and then cut into bit size chunks.
3. Separate the yolks from the egg whites.  Chop the egg whites.
4. Mash the yolks in a bowl with a fork and then stir in the mayo, mustard, salt,and pepper.  The mixture will be salty to taste, but it is the amount of salt needed to season the dish as a whole,  Mixing it into the wet mixture will help is disperse more evenly throughout the salad.
5. Add the mayo/egg mixture to the potatoes along with the onion, celery,egg whites, and olives.  Fold gently to coat the potatoes.
6. Chill before serving.
 

Cashew Ricotta

It was during the reintroduction phase of my first Whole30 all the way back in February of 2018 that I figured out that dairy and myself don't really get along.  It took a second round of Whole30 for me to cut down on my dairy consumption by about half, and finally a third round for me to cut it out of my everyday life.  I have a slice of pizza here and there and a couple times a year I have some ice cream and other dairy laden treats (and I pay for it) but it's no longer something I have on a day to day basis and keep in my house.

Cutting out dairy meant finding substitutes for some of my favorites.  Cashew milk is my new milk of choice.  Still on the hunt for a sour cream sub (let me know if you have one)  Nutritional yeast is not the same but still delicious for a salty cheese feel, and this cashew mix is a great dupe for ricotta.

Simply soak some raw cashews and allow them to plump

Then blend it together with seasonings, lemon juice, and nutritional yeast until smooth and creamy

The result is a delicious and creamy spread, filling, or dip.  I love to stuff it it in eggplant to make eggplant cannelloni.  It's also delicious as a spread on crackers or bread, or a dip for fresh veggies.  It's super versatile! Switch up the herbs and seasonings and you can make endless creamy dips and spreads without the dairy.

Cashew Ricotta

2 C. Cashews

1 Tb. Nutritional yeast 

1 tsp. Kosher salt

1 tsp. Granulated garlic (or 1 clove fresh)

1 tsp. Dried basil

Pepper to taste

Juice of 1 lemon

4 TB. Cashew milk (may sub almond milk or some of the soaking water from the cashews)

Soak the cashews in water for 8 hours or until plumped to about double in size (you can speed this process up if needed by boiling or microwaving).  Drain the water.

Blend the cashews with the seasonings, lemon juice, and cashew milk until smooth and creamy.  Scrape the sides of the bowl often to ensure everything gets blended evenly.

Super Paloma

Tequila is by far my liquor of choice.  I have bouts where I will buy a bottle of vodka here and there. Tropical Truly's are my go to for travel and have been my homie during quarantine so that I can keep track of my life a little better (ie they are what they are and I can't make them any stronger....I tried to keep mixing my own drinks to a minimum during this time because I can get a little heavy handed)  BUT......I always come back to my precious tequila.

I had no idea that for years and years I had been making palomas at home.  I always just called them ghetto girl margaritas.  That was until one day I was explaining to my coworkers how I make my "ghetto girl margaritas" Tequila, Fresca or Squirt, some lime....and she said.... "oh, so a paloma"

A quick google search later.....yes, a paloma. 

Who knew?  

Apparently not me.

So here we are now, a couple years later.  The Boy made me one a couple weeks ago that I dubbed the Super Paloma because it's grapefruit, on grapefruit, on grapefruit. Grapefruit inception.

Grapefruit juice, grapefruit soda, and dried grapefruit zest mixed with the the rim job.  

It's super refreshing, not overly sweet, and the tequila still shines through.  Everything I am looking for in a good cocktail.  With the hot weather here or someday approaching depending on where you are from.  (I'm pouring one out for you NYers who got snow this week...good god!) this is the perfect addition to your summer line up of cocktails.

Grapefruit Salt:

Zest 2 large grapefruits.  Lay the zest out flat in a single layer and allow it to air dry out overnight.  When it is dry, mix it with coarse salt. (we just use coarse kosher salt because we always have it on hand)  

Cocktail:

1 1/2 jiggers of grapefruit juice

1 1/2 jiggers of silver tequila (that Kirkland bottle from Costco is the BEST!)

2 jiggers of Fresca or other grapefruit soda

Shake lightly with ice and pour into a glass that has the grapefruit salt rim

 

Crap My Mom Always Said......That Now I Say Too

In the words of the great Fran Fine, “Whoa! Was that my mother that just crossed the Brooklyn Bridge and came flying out my mouth?"

I think we all have had a moment like that from time to time.  It seems inevitable……sort of the circle of like but in the form of slight nagginess followed by a few eye rolls from the recipient.  I figured there was no better time than Mother’s Day weekend to highlight the ones I find myself using on the regular.

“Close the door! We’re not air conditioning Phoenix”

As a kid I was like GEEEZ…calm your tits lady! (alright…maybe not those EXACT words) Now as an adult I get it.  Boy do I get it….  We basically live on the surface of the sun and the second you open that door all that cool air just goes FLYING out and then you need to run your AC an extra 40 mins to make up for it.  Its anxiety inducing.  And costs a lot of money.  I get it now. 

“Failure to plan on your part doesn’t constitute an emergency on mine”

Gurrrl.  For sure, this one is the wisest of the bunch. It also upped my vocabulary at a young age with throwing around the word constitute like a boss.  Unfortunately I haven’t said it out loud yet…..it only gets used when I am having intense confrontation…alone….in the shower.  I get REAL ballsy when I shower fight.  New goal: say it to someone who deserves it.  I wish I could have said this to an old boss of mine a time or two…..or 785.

“We all have our jobs”

Both me and The Boy say this one A LOT!  It’s pretty much always used in the context of being semi useless or annoying….but something about you is redeeming or tolerable.  Like our cat laying on EVERYTHING we need, walking on our computers, knocking shit off the counter.  Enter the phrase: ”We all have our jobs”  Babies that do nothing besides shit and sometimes act cute….”We all have our jobs”  Basically, take your pick of someone/something annoying but tolerable and this one will most likely work.

This is where I suddenly realized those were the only 3 phrases I actively used at this point in my life, but there are a few I COULD see myself saying one day when I have kids.  In fact, some of my sisters admit to using some of these phrases with their own chitlins.

“I’m not on the entertainment committee”

My mom had ZERO tolerance for whining, especially related to boredom.  She didn’t want to hear it, and this was usually her response. 

“If you’re bored, I’ll find you something to do”

You were LUCKY if you got the entertainment committee comment, otherwise you got this one.  You learned quickly in our house to never let the word bored escape your lips….it could be dangerous.

“Are your hands painted on?”

My sister said she has used this one on her girls.  It was her way of throwing shade at us for not getting in or helping with something.  It’s a non-cursing way of saying “Would you fucking DO something??”

And her lies the phrases we could have done without……

“Here, while you’re resting….”

This one was usually followed by having the laundry basket handed to you while you watched TV.  Damn it Mom!  I just wanted to watch Boy Meets World in peace…..

(One of my sisters said she was particularly triggered by this one)

“It’s Not Fashions On Parade”

I’m the youngest of 4 girls so we had our fair share of waiting on one or two of us to get ready before leaving the house.  The funny part is I totally knew what she meant by the statement growing up but had no idea Fashions on Parade was an actual TV show from the 40s until I was much older.  I always thought it was her own phrase she had completely coined herself.

“Because I said so, THAT’S why!”

Extra emphasis on the word “that.” Really put some gusto into it…..from the diaphragm!  As a kid I probably rolled my eyes (figuratively of course.  She would have smacked me if I did it for real) at this phrase the most.

Psssssh.  I want to know WHY I can’t wander the mall alone with friends in the 4^th grade…..WHYYYY?!?

It was my small resistance to authority.

Now I’m 30 and I’m all….”Oh,...THAT’S why….” 

And just to round it all out and make it an even 10 phrases, I wanted to add an honorable mention spoken by one of my sisters.  I once heard her utter a phrase that for me goes down in Mommin’ history.  I look forward to the day when I can throw it into regular rotation.

Ready?

Drum roll……..

“I want you to take two brain cells and rub them together”

Poetic right?  And just imagine it with the miming of your thumb and pointer finger rubbing together.  It really drives the point home. Definitely a top moment in my life.

What were some of your moms momisms?  Or have you started creating your own?

Soft & Chewy Sugar Cookies

Chocolate chip cookies are overrated.

There. I said it.

Unless they're in the form of a pizzookie with a giant dollop of melting vanilla ice cream.....I can take a pass on them pretty easily.  Unpopular opinion, I know.  But I also HATE apple pie so I'm used to this sort of judgment.

But a sugar cookie?  Girrlll....pass them this way.  Frosted, plain, cakey, chewy....I'll take any form of sugar cookie.  Call me plain, vanilla....boring.  I'll take it.  I stand in my power.  (I hope someone, somewhere knows what cringey reality TV scene I am referring to with that and laughs)

I have two different sugar cookies in my arsenal. Both are delicious but serve two totally different purposes.  One is a thicker and a tiny bit on the cakier side.  It's perfect for cut out cookies for frosting and decorating.

The other other that I am sharing today is soft and chewy and your basic scoop and drop type cookie.  While you could totally frost them if you really wanted to, they don't need it the way the other ones feel sort of incomplete without it.  

I have been tweaking this recipe little by little for the last few years.  I'm finally calling it (for now) and ready to share! They have that crisp edge with a perfectly chewy center. While the almond extract is completely optional, it is sooo good!  You can add less if you would like but it adds a little sumthin' sumthin.  If you're looking for a plain cookie just skip the sprinkles too, but who doesn't love funfetti??

Soft & Chewy Sugar Cookies


1 cup room temperature butter
2 cups sugar
2 eggs
2 tsp. vanilla 
1 1/2 tsp. almond extract

3 cups flour
1/2 tsp. salt
1 tsp. baking soda
2 tsp. corn starch
1/2 cup sprinkles (optional)


Cream together butter and sugar until light and fluffy, about 4 minutes, stopping to scrape down the sides of the bowl several times.  Beat in eggs one at a time until incorporated smoothly.  Stir in extracts.

Whisk together the dry ingredients (minus the sprinkles) in a bowl (bonus points if you sift them).  Gradually add the dry ingredients to the wet, about a third at a time. Stir in sprinkles at the very end. 

Refrigerate dough a minimum of 2 hours (I prefer to make it to make it the night before I intend to bake it)  Scoop walnut sized cookies onto baking sheet and bake for 9-13 mins at 350° depending on your oven and how crisp you like them. 

How to Keep "Healthy" Food from Being Boring As F***

The idea for /this blog post has been floating around my head for a while but never made it to paper (errr....screen) as most of my blog posts do.  (or don't)

What made me finally get around to writing it was my coworker.  My 9-5 (more like 7-3:30) is for a school district and 2 of my friends who are registered dietitians were going to present for a series of culinary classes at the high schools.  The bulk of their presentation was focused on intuitive eating and trends but she asked  me if I there was anything I would have liked to have known when I was back in high school and taking the same class.  

This. This is what I wish I could have learned.  That "healthy" food doesn't have to be boring. (healthy is in quotes because we all have different definitions of it.  It's pretty arbitrary but this is all about what works for YOU)

How many of you have ever met a person whose sole idea of "health" is eating salads?  I don't know it irritates me so much but it does.  "Well, I've been eating salads everyday so I'm being a lot more healthy"...as I stand there biting my tongue so hard if I opened my mouth I think the tip of  of would fall to the ground.

Or all the peoples whose weekly meal prep photos they post consists of a sea of tupperware full of broccoli, dry ass chicken breast....and maybe a side of fruit or sweaty looking sweat potato cubes if they're lucky.

Here's the thing, by all means eat the salad or plain ass chicken and steamed broccoli.  If that's  your thing, do it.  I'm just here to give a few ideas for those of us who need a little more pizzazz and flavor.  Some simple tricks can help with variety and stave off  food boredom.

Utilize Cooking Techniques That Enhance Flavor

Boiling isn't doing a damn thing for most foods. Grilling and roasting for example impart MUCH more flavor than steaming and boiling.  

What's better: Steamed brussel sprouts or roasted?

 Exactly.

Simple cooking technique swaps can make a HUGE difference.

Season, Season, Season!

Ok, so maybe not everyone is already like me and eats tomato slices as a side like I'm 85 but you might consider eating more things if you if you just added a little flavor.  Avocado,tomatoes, and even hard boiled eggs are delicious on their own topped with Everything But the Bagel Seasoning (which is good on pretty much everything)  Things like radishes, jicama, and cucumber are perfect for topping with Tajin or even just chili and garlic powders.  Brainstorm ways you can introduce more veggies and proteins into your day with a little sprinkle of somthin' somthin.

Herb is the Word

When you think of herbs what kind of dishes come to mind?  Maybe you think of basil in a caprese salad or cilantro in salsa.....but overall I tend to think that fresh herbs are underutilized.  There's so many other ways you can use them to really add a punch of flavor.  

Here's some ideas:

• Add chopped rosemary to your popcorn
•  Try adding fresh herbs to your salads.  We fill our salads with allll kinds of other greens but forget about herbs.  Cilantro is great and brightens up any boring salad.  Or how about a fun play on a Vietnamese spring roll...ever had one? The kind that are cold and have shrimp, (or other proteins) veggies, and herbs all rolled up in rice paper. You could mimic those flavors by adding basil and mint to your salad with carrots, cucumbers, and shrimp.

Marinating

I'm sure you know this already, but marinating is the best!  That plain ass chicken would be waaaay better given a little time in a marinade first (then even better if you use one of the flavorful cooking techniques mentioned earlier) Sometimes I think people over complicate it in their head thinking they need to follow an exact recipe with a million ingredients, but just look around your pantry and fridge and I'm sure you'll have plenty of things you can pair together to whip up something tasty.  

Some of my favorite ingredients to use are:

• Acids (citrus, vinegar)
• Oil
• Garlic
• Seasonings
• Herbs
• Worcestershire sauce
• Salad dressings
• Soy sauce or coconut aminos
• Dijon mustard

Some other things to remember is that you don't always need to marinate for hours and hours. Even an hour will do you better than nothing.  And marinating isn't just for meats!Try marinating beans and veggies too.

When I Dip You Dip We Dip....and Sauce

Sauces and dips can make even the most boring foods more exciting to eat.  I'll eat ANYTHING if I can have it with aioli.  It's great as a dip for roasted veggies, slathering on burgers, chicken, and fishcakes....literally anything! 

But I guess there are some other things besides aioli that are pretty good too 😜..........

• Salsas
• Simple pan sauces
• Aiolis (in case you hadn't picked up on that earlier
• Hummus
• Babaganoush 
• Pesto
• Romesco
• Vinaigrettes  
• Mustard
• Chimichurri

....and so much more!

Drop Some Acid!

Adding a touch of acid can be soooo beneficial to food and in my opinion is forgotten the most. It brightens the flavors of food and can help cut through richness in creamy/fatty things.

• A squeeze of lemon over salad greens with some olive oil makes for an easy dressing
• Citrus (both the juice and zest) adds some freshness to cream sauces and aiolis (cuts the richness as mentioned earlier)
• Acid can also be added in the form of pickled items (think pickled onion on a street taco) for an extra pop of flavor.

Texture with Crunch

Having a variety of textures in my food is important to me.  I can't do just a big plate of soft food....I need a little crunch for interest!  

• Add roasted chickpeas to your salads in place of croutons.   You can season them a million different ways.
• Add nuts and seeds to your salads.  I'm always adding sunflower seeds.  
• Try adding toasted nuts to your rice (whether it be the actual grain rice, cauliflower, or broccoli the idea is the same)  My go to picks are toasted almonds and pine nuts.  That little added crunch makes all the difference.

.Well there you have it folks.  Hopefully this helps spark some ideas on how to keep your healthy food from being boring as f***.  What do you do to keep your food interesting?