Veggie Confetti Slaw

About 3 years ago I found myself in the same position I am in every June.  Cranky, swamp-assy, and hungry.  The hungry part is a year round thing.....but I digress....

Summers in Arizona are brutal. Like I HATE the summer time.  You always hear about Seasonal Depression but most of the time its in reference to cold and gloomy weather.  Well, for me it's the opposite.  The same way people feel trapped from the cold, I feel trapped from the heat.  The most annoying part is everyone seems to think I should just be ok with it since I'm a native.  I can say something as simple as "It's like an oven out there!" and suddenly everyone has an opinion and their judgy eyes 😏

"Aren't you from here?"

"You're like a native right? Aren't you used to it by now?

"If it's so bad then move."

And then I look like this:

🙄

Yes, I am born and raised here.  No, I am not used to it.  I'll never get used to having a slip and slide between my boobs half the year.  I'll never get used to feeling sweat drip from the back of my neck, down my back, and into my butt crack.  And I don't think I'll ever just be "ok" with it still being 90 degrees at 3am. K?  Just let me feel my feels people!!


It's annoying......but back to being swampy assy, cranky, and most importantly HUNGRY!


Every summer I try to come up with as many cold meals as possible.  Turning on the oven is just.....

That leaves cold meals or limited stove top cooking (cuz even that can really heat up the house)  One day a couple years ago I really needed a side to go with a rotisserie chicken I bought (I'll leave the meat roasting to the grocery stores from May-August).  I went through my fridge and used literally every vegetable I had and created this slaw.  I've been obsessed with it ever since!  I make it almost weekly during the summer for the last 3 years.  

My recipe uses Jalapeno powder, but you can leave it out altogether or substitute with any other form of heat you like. My mom bought it for me at small spice shop and I really love it!  It's an easy way to get a really even heat as opposed to fresh jalapeno.  Since it's a powder it mixes well into the dressing for even distribution.  No biting down on chunks of jalapeno or getting a serving that has none at all.  I've seen it sold on Amazon if you want to give it a go.....I highly recommend it!

Veggie Confetti Slaw


1 small head red cabbage, shredded
2 sweet  bell  peppers, julienned
3 c. shredded carrot
8 green onion, sliced thin
2 cucumbers, seeded and julienned
1 bunch cilantro finely chopped (about 3/4c.)

Dressing:
1 c. mayo
2 tsp. garlic powder
1/2-2 tsp. jalapeno powder depending on desired heat (optional)
1 tsp. cumin
1 1/2 tsp. kosher salt
Zest and juice of one lime

 Toss all sliced and julienned veggies together in large bowl.  Whisk together all ingredients for dressing and pour over veggies.  Toss to coat evenly.  Best if allowed to sit at least one hour before serving.

Low Carb Salmon Cakes with Spicy Remoulade

Do you like salmon? 

Do you like cake?

If you answered yes to both these questions then you should try my salmon cakes!  Except they are nothing even relatively close to cake....but it got you to keep reading. Right?

They are super easy and tasty on their own, but it's the remoulade that really puts it over the top.  I LOOOVE  cold sauces. Aiolis, remoulades, cocktail, tarter....any of them!  Load me up! I always make a big batch to have leftovers to eat with anything and everything. I just can't get enough of it 

Here goes!

Salmon Cakes

1/2 C. small diced celery

3/4 C. small diced red bell pepper

1/2 C. sliced green onion

(3) 5oz cans boneless skinless salmon

2 Tb. brown mstard

6 Tb. mayo

3 tsp. old bay seasoning

2 tsp. garlic powder

1 C. finely ground pork rinds)

2 eggs, beaten

Combine all the ingredients together well.  Allow to sit for 10 minutes before forming into patties so it has to to absorb the moisture and stick together better.

Form into patties using a 1/4 c.  Pan fry in high smoke point oil over medium high heat until golden brown on each side.  If you think they have browned before the centers have set, you can always bake them until set and firm in the middle. Serve with spicy remoulade

Spicy Remoulade

1C. mayo

5 Tb. minced dill pickle

1 Tb. chopped capers

2 Tb. minced green onion

2 cloves minced garlic

1/2 tsp. cayenne pepper

1/2 tsp. Tabasco

2 tsp. paprika

1 tsp. lemon juice

Salt to taste

Combine all ingredients.   Best when made ahead of time so flavors can meld

Chopped Salad with Hearts of Palm

So here's my issue with salad.....they're a lot of work to eat!  Back in the old days when I actually took lunch breaks I used to eat off the salad bar at work. Every. Single. Day. 

By the time I built my salad, waited in line to buy it, then sat down at the table I had about 20 minute left of my 30 minute break. Then I had to sit and stab at and cut everything up.  I absolutely HATE giant leaves of lettuce and big chunks of everything.  I much prefer everything to be bite size. Not only so I can get a little bit of everything in a fork full, but also so I can shovel it in my face faster with less mess.  I'm not a dainty eater and I need all the help I can get.

I would sit there for what seemed like forever hacking and sawing at everything with a plastic fork and knife leaving me with just a few minutes to eat and a cranky attitude

Since The Boy definitely doesn't need another reason for me to be cranky, at home I always make my salads chopped salads. It's the only way to go in my cookbook! (<----see what I did there?)

Here's a recent one I made that I really loved

And I really should just stop taking ingredients pictures...because I forgot something about 90% of the time.  In this case there's no roasted sunflower seeds pictured.  Use your imagination. They're small, grey, and crunchy...in case you were wondering


This is not really a recipe as much as it is an ingredients list.  Use however much ingredients you need depending on if you're making a salad for one or a crowd. You can swap out the bacon for turkey....or have both! You get the idea. Make it your own.  As long as it's all chopped up bite size you're good to go

Chopped Salad with Hearts of Palm

Bacon, cooked and crumbled
Crunchy lettuce like romaine or iceberg, chopped
Diced avocado
Chopped hearts of palm
Chopped hard boiled egg
Shredded cheddar cheese
Diced cucumber
Diced sweet bell pepper
Cherry tomatoes halved or quartered
Red onion, shaved or finely diced
Roasted sunflower seeds

Mix all ingredients together and dress with dressing of choice.  I used my Cilnatro Green Goddess Dressing which added a good brightness

Cilantro Green Goddess Dressing

It's Summer....it's hot.....and turning on my oven just isn't happening.  My AC is already running 24/7 and I'm pretty sure my house would never recover if I turned on the oven

That leaves meals to the stove top  or cold dishes....and I'll gladly take a cold dish in this sweltering Arizona heat.  I've had a huge craving for salads lately so I thought it was time to stop being lazy and depending on bottled dressings and make my own

I combined pretty much everything I love...cilantro, mayo, lemon, garlic....and some other yum yums!

It's super simple....just combine all the ingredients together in a food processor or blender and you're done!  I forgot white vinegar in my ingredients picture.....whoops!  If you're thinking that it sounds like too much acid using both lemon AND vinegar....it's not I promise! Even though they are both acidic they hit your palate in different ways that I love together. If you are leery about it, start with the juice of one lemon along with the vinegar and then add more lemon juice from there.  I LOVE lemon so I did the juice of 2 lemons.  Don't be afraid to play around and adjust things to your taste.

 Oh and about the anchovies.....they really are delicious!  I totally understand if you don't want to go biting into one straight out of the can....but they really do make the dressing!  Just like they do in caesar dressing....it adds a depth and saltiness that you would totally miss out on if you left them out.  Don't be scurred!


It's delicious of course as a salad dressing or just as a dip.  And I'm drooling over the thought of eating it over a nice flank steak....yum!  You could do so  much with this...it's not just for greens

 Cilantro Green Goddess Dressing

1 cup mayo
1 cup sour cream
3 anchovy fillets
1 bunch cilantro . All the leaves and 1/2 the stems
Juice of 1-2 lemons (I do 2)
2 cloves garlic
5 green onion
1 Tb. white vinegar
Salt & Pepper to taste


Blend all the ingredients together in a blender or food processor.  Store in airtight container in the fridge
 

Loaded Jalepeno Poppers

Chances are you've had a bacon wrapped jalepeno popper before. Over the years they seem to becoming more and more popular.  I love them because they are super delicious....but also low carb!

They are one of my go to dishes when I'm going to a BBQ or potluck because everybody loves them but they are still in line with my way of eating.  It's very rare to find a "diet" food that's also a crowd pleaser....so when you find it you gotta hold onto it!

The basic recipe for these bacon wrapped jalepeno poppers is just cream cheese stuffed inside half a jalepno and then wrapped in bacon.  While this is definitely delicious and I would never turn it down....I think it can be improved upon.

When I was making them one day I decided to clean out my fridge a little in the process.  I threw in minced cilantro, chopped green onion, and garlic powder in with my softened cream cheese....but basically you could throw in whatever you want.  That's what makes them "loaded"

Some other ingredients I've used in the past is:

Cheddar cheese (or any cheese for that matter)

Diced olives

Fine diced ham

Chorizo

Italian sausage

Green chilies (for a double chile kick)

Roasted bell peppers

....the list could go on forever!

Just mix anything you want with one package of softened cream cheese and stuff it inside a seeded jalepeno half.  I find medium sized peppers work best

Another thing I do different than most recipes I've seen is that I use half a slice of bacon per half popper where as other recipes have you cut your bacon in thirds.  1/3 of a slice just isn't enough bacon for me.  I like to make sure the whole thing is covered.  I only do a 1/3 piece if my peppers happen to be really small.....but that's entirely up to you.  Are you a halfy or a thirdy?

Wrap the bacon around your stuffed pepper half and secure with a toothpick.  Place on a wire rack that is placed over top a baking sheet to catch all the bacon grease.  This way your popper won't be sitting in the grease and it will be able to render and get crisp as well as cook more evenly with the heat going completely around it

Bake at 375 for about 30-35 minutes depending on how crisp you want your bacon.  After 30 minutes of torture you'll get a nice big plate of deliciousness like this

They may not be the prettiest things in the world but who the heck cares when they taste this good

Now go do yourself a favor and go make these suckers.  You'll be killing two birds with one stone....a delicious snack AND cleaning out your fridge in the process.  How's that for productivity??
 

Avocado and Hearts of Palm Salad

Calling all Bethenny Frankel fans......

Remember that episode of "Bethenny Getting Married" where she has a book signing at Costco and only like 3 people show up?  So she scams out and goes grocery shopping instead?

Of course you remember the episode!....you're a huge fan!

Well do you remember how excited she got over finding the hearts of palm?  That pregnant broad was PUMPED.  And I actually remember her excitement getting me all excited.  Like man.....I should really try that stuff!  If Bethenny is clapping her hands and jumping up and down while preggo it must be pretty damn good right?

I had all the best intentions of buying some to try....and never did.

That was until I found row upon row of it at 99c Only.  And honestly....I'm pretty sure I did a similar clap and dance to Bethenny.  And for a dolla! 

It was then that I finally knew the love that is the heart of palm.  Crisp without being crunchy it has a mild flavor reminiscent to artichokes.  Texture wise I would say it's like an artichoke heart but slightly firmer.   It's just yummy and you should try it ASAP.  Like in this salad.......

Avocado and Hearts of Palm Salad

3 cans hearts of palm, cut
4 avocados, diced
2 pints grape tomatoes, halved
6 green onions chopped
1 small (or 1/2 medium or large) red onion, shaved with vegetable peeler
1 bunch cilantro, minced
2 cloves garlic, minced (I run it over a micrplane for quick mincing)
Zest of 1 lime
Juice of 3 limes
Salt & pepper to taste


Mix all ingredients together and chill before serving.  If you prefer your avocado more chunky  add it last and gently toss ingredients together. I, however,  prefer mine to get broken up and create a sort of "sauce" for the salad.

This salad is perfect for those hot summer months and will surely become a summer salad staple.  I brought this to a BBQ and was surprised how much everyone loved it.

Now go get your paws on some hearts of palm!!!

Shrimp Salad Cucumber Cups

My sister was having a casual get together at her house a few weekends ago to watch the UFC fight.  Which means a night of the men in the living room actually watching the fight and the women huddled around in the dining room talking about Pinterest and my sisters upcoming wedding.

I wanted to bring something low carb that everyone could eat and not feel like I was bringing diet food....ya know?  I had a bunch of cucumbers in my veggie drawer that were at the use em or lose em stage.  Why on earth I felt the need to buy like 10 on my last grocery trip I'll never know.

And I was craving shrimp.....so the shrimp salad cucumber cup was born.  Not that it hadn't been born somewhere else before....just that particular day I felt very inspired so I'm claiming it as mine...k?

I bought a bag of frozen precooked shrimp (You can use raw and cook them yourself but I was on a time crunch) thawed them under water and diced small.  I added diced red onion, red bell pepper, celery, cilantro, a sprinkle of garlic powder, salt, pepper, and lemon juice.

Looks yummy right?

And just to bind it all together...I added a touch of mayo

Now it's time to make your cucumber cups.

Cut your cucumbers in chunks of however tall you want your cups to me.  I made mine kind of tall thinking I wanted them to hold more salad but I think next time I'll cut them shorter and just have more cups over all.

Then, using a melon baller or spoon scoop out some of the seeds but DO NOT go through all the way to the bottom or your filling will all fall out

And.....FILL!!

Forewarning.....they juice like crazy when you take a bite.  Eat them with a plate

Shrimp Salad Cucumber Cups

12 oz. cooked shrimp, diced

2 red bell peppers, diced

1/2 red onion, diced

2 stalks celery, diced

1/2 bunch of cilantro minced

Juice of 1-2 lemons depending on how lemony you like things (2 for me please!)

1 tsp. garlic powder

Salt & Pepper

1/4 C. Mayo

 Cucumbers (number of them depends on how big you make your cups.  I would have at least 5)

Mix the shrimp, bell pepper, red onion, celery, and cilantro in a bowl.  Add your seasonings, lemon juice and mayo adjusting to your own taste.

Cut the cucumber in chunks and hollow out using a spoon or melon baller being sure not to poke through the bottom so your "Cup" stays in tact and the salad won't fall out.  Fill the cups with the shrimp salad, garnish if desired, and serve

Low Carb Chicken Nuggets

Me and nuggets o' chicken go way back. Served with gobs of ranch they were one of my favorite dinners as a kid. My mom would buy the good ones from Schwans.  As I got older my sister Kinsey and I loved hitting up the McDonalds drive thru late at night for some tasty boot shaped chicken and The Boy and I frequented Wendy's after school when we were dating.  Basically, I love them.  But trips to the drive thru are very rare these days as I've started focusing on my health the last 2-3 years or so.  I had a serious hankering the other day and knew I needed to make some ASAP that fit my healthier eating habits.  I actually can't believe I had not made my own low carb version before now....crazy!

Here's my thought process.  I remember my sister telling me she had made some for her kids with an almond meal breading and they loved them.  Then again I'm also in love with a parmesan cheese breading like I use for my Low Carb Mozzarella Sticks and my Eggplant Parm Stacks....so I figured combining the two couldn't be bad...right?

So here's what I did.  First I cut up four huge chicken breasts into chunks. When I say they were huge I mean they were HUGE.  Like this is totally not natural huge.  Like how much hormones did they pump into this single chicken huge.  Like no wonder little girls are getting boobs at the age of 6 from all the hormones we eat huge.....

Note to self: Make more money so I can afford to buy chicken that isn't pumped full of crap

Then I mixed up equal parts almond meal and grated parmesan cheese.  1 cup of each was enough for these 4 breasts.  Season with seasonings of your choice.  I used Garlic Herb Mrs. Dash, salt, and pepper.  I dipped my finger in the goodness to see if it was seasoned enough.  That's the beauty of this....you can do that to parmesan cheese and ground almonds.  You wouldn't be able to dip your finger in plain flour and taste if it's ready or not now would ya?  Consider that another low carb win...

Looks like I got all caught up in the process and forgot to take pictures but it's pretty simple.  Whisk a few eggs in a bowl, dip your chicken in it, and roll it in your breading.  Place on a parchment or wax paper lined baking sheet

Place the whole pan of these in the freezer.  Just like I did with my eggplant parm and mozzarella sticks the freezing helps the crust adhere better to the food.  It will also keep the cheese from melting too quickly when you go to fry it later.

I stuck them in the freezer with every intention of making them for dinner that night.  Then I took a nap and woke up too lazy to do anything...so I simply bagged them up and put them back in the freezer.  

I realized that this is awesome though!  One day you could bread up a whole bunch and freeze them in bags to pull out whenever you want.   I didn't end up pulling them out to use until over a week later but it all worked out beautifully

Just lightly pan fry them to get a golden color. It actually took very little oil for anybody who is concerned with it being fried. Make sure your oil is nice and hot or the breading will start to fall off before it can get brown and crispy. 

Then place them on your cookie sheet and bake at 350 until they reach 165 degrees. (I actually placed mine on a cooling rack and then placed the entire rack over the baking sheet. This way they get crispy all around and not soggy on the bottom) The bake time all depends on how big you cut them or how long you fried them....but mine took about 15 minutes.

They were so stinkin good! Totally satisfied my craving.  

Oh and for the record....those aren't french fries.  They're rutabaga fries.  It really completed the nostalgic childhood meal feel

*Note: I tried baking a few just to see how they would turn out.  I sprayed them with a little cooking spray and baked them at 350.  By the time they got to a point of crispiness that I liked they were sort of dry on the inside.  Frying is the way to go for me because I like my nuggets more crisp...but if you don't mind a less crunchy nugget than baking might work for you

Low Carb Chicken Nuggets

4 chicken breasts cut into chunks

2 eggs whisked in a small bowl

1 cup grated parmesan cheese

1 cup almond meal

Seasonings of choice

Oil to pan fry

Combine the cheese, almond meal, and seasonings in a bowl.  Dip the chicken chunks in egg, roll in the cheese/almond mixture, and place on a parchment or wax paper lined baking sheet.  Once they are all breaded place the whole pan in the freezer to let the breading adhere better.  Once frozen, pan fry the chicken in hot oil until golden brown.  Place on a baking sheet (or on a cooling rack placed over a baking sheet to get crispy all over) and bake at 350 until they reach 165

Low Carb Mulled Apple Cider

So I probably should have posted this a while ago. Say.....like 2-3 months ago during the Fall when EVERYTHING is either apple or pumpkin flavored.  But I didn't....but the beauty of this is it doesn't require an actual apples.  Who cares if it's apple season??

All you need is some sugar free apple flavored drink of sorts...ya know...Crystal light or the wannabe Crystal Lights.  I use the Wally World stuff

Mix it up according to the directions in a pot

I like when cider has hints of orange so I sprinkled in some orange flavoring too...not too much

For a little more depth of flavor a gave a few squirts of this sugar free honey substitute too

Throw in a few cinnamon sticks and cloves or whatever mulling spices you like and let it all simmer together.  

You can keep all your Scentsy melters turned off that day....cuz when you make this deliciousness the wonderful smell will fill your entire house.  You got yourself  a tasty drink and an air freshener here.  I love a good 2 for 1.

It makes a big batch so I bottled up the leftovers and just microwaved it in a mug whenever I wanted it

All the same tasty goodness without the mounds of sugar

 

Low Carb Chicken Zoodle Soup

If you're looking for all the same great flavors and cozy feelings that come with a big bowl of chicken noodle soup but without the gluten and carb gut....I have exactly that. Chicken zoodle soup!

If you're already following a low carb or gluten free life style you've most likely heard of or even made zucchini noodles before....but if you haven't now is your chance

You can make your zoodles using a julienne peeler, a spiral slicer, or a mandolin slicer

 

Whip up a pot of your favorite chicken soup.  I had some homemade broth in the freezer and emptied out my fridge of all my vegetables that were walking the line of floppy and wrinkly...onions, yellow bell pepper, a little carrot, and celery.  Along with some garlic, diced chicken, and a bay leaf I had a pot of steaming deliciousness.

Since my zoodles were so thin I didn't want to risk throwing them into the pot with the rest of the stuff and risk them turning to mush and losing all their texture

Sooo.....I decided to put a handful of the raw zoodles at the bottom of my bowl and ladled the steamy chicken soup on top and let it sit for a few minutes before I ate it to let them cook a bit without going to mush. It worked out perfectly. Another way you could do it could be to lightly saute them in a pan and then add them to your bowl 

My favorite way to eat my chicken soup is to eat it sort of Pho style with lots of condiments. Here I added sriracha, cilantro, green onion, and a little bit of soy (or coconut aminos)

 All mixed up and delicious

I wish I had bean sprouts on hand too...would have made it even better


I seriously didn't miss the pasta....and I'm not just saying that

Low Carb Meatloaf

Meatloaf  tends to get a bad reputation

No, not that Meatloaf....well he is a little misunderstood too.....but I'm talking about the literal loaf o' meat

There aren't a whole lot of people in the middle when it comes to this classic dish. You tend to either LOVE it like I do or turn your nose up at it.

The Boy was never a fan because he remembers it as a dry, bland, brick of meat he was forced to eat as a child.  That's why I was on a mission to make him like it as much as I do all while sticking to our low carb ways.

Now I'm not normally a brand name dropping kind of gal when it comes to herbs and spices.  I usually buy whatever is cheapest which tends to be the store brand.  But this is one of the few times I highly suggest buying a specific brand and that is McCormick Meatloaf Seasoning

We use this to make meatloaf at my work and it opened my eyes to a whole other world of meatloafy deliciousness.  It takes all the guess work out of whether or not you have enough seasoning....it's all there! 

My meatloaf contains the normal ingredients.  Celery, onion, egg, but one ingredient my surprise you.  Green chiles.  They don't make it taste like green chile per say, but it keeps it super moist and flavorful.

And then to make this recipe low carb I swapped out the bread crumbs for crushed pork rinds....an absolute perfect substitute that binds it together nicely

One random note: I never actually put my meatloaf in a bread loaf pan like my mom did.  I prefer to free form it onto a foil lined sheet tray.  This way it doesn't sit in the grease like it would in the pan....there's room for the grease to run off

And the good news is The Boy loved it!  His exact words were that it was one of the best meals I've cooked in a long time.  He immediately followed that by saying "not that everything you cook isn't good....this is just REALLY good"  Good save bro.....good save ;)

So I think I may have officially changed his mind on meatloaf.  I consider this a big victory.

Low Carb Meatloaf

2# ground beef

2 stalks celery, diced

1 small onion diced

7oz can chopped green chiles

2 eggs

1/2 c. crushed pork rinds

2 cloves garlic, minced

1 pack of McCormick Meatloaf seasoning

*Sugar free Ketchup & Worcestershire sauce for topping

Mix together all ingredients until well incorporated but try not to over mix or the meatloaf will be tough.  Form into a loaf on a foil lined baking sheet.  Mix together ketchup and worcestershire sauce to taste and spread over the entire meatloaf. Bake at 350 until reaches a minimum of 155 degrees.  I suggest checking at 40 minutes